I was one of those broken ones, raised by the broken ones, the repeated cycle, and a victim of my circumstances that eventually victimized others.
I'm also a seed and there's one place that I haven't been planted and that's below earth. Yet, I've also stood and continue to stand under a lot of rain that enables me to continue to grow. Sometimes, I feel like I need 988, sometimes I want my momma, I want connection to help me complete knowledge of self.
I've found and understood the levels of my own fragility because, where I come from there are a few obstacles that force you to become morally strong, yet at the same time it snatches away a part of your understanding and gruesomely shapes your values. But I fell for that trap and I did the one thing that I hope no one ever does to me. It's crazy because there's been way too many times when the darkness felt so safe. I didn't even know what empathy was until the system locked me up. When I gained knowledge of what empathy was, I understood it right away because that's something I've always felt but the values I had developed had already bullied that consideration side of my brain. Besides anything that could hurt another person and a clouded state of mind and a fucked-up value system, I have lost it all, everything except my faith. I'm a very expressive man and some people will avoid me to my ability to be so passionate or the fact that I am not afraid of having uncomfortable conversations. I just really like communication.
My momma went through hell being 16 years old, alone and with me in her belly. Can you imagine the conversations she had with me in the dark when she cried and wished the best for me?
If you know me, then thank you for watering my seed. If you don't know me, then it would be an honor to get to know you. I'm worth the time. If you feel me, then whatever connection you have that allowed you to feel me, then PLEASE water that seed and as I once heard a sister say, "you have to love the broken ones raised by the broken ones."
I hope that's as easy as it sounds, travel with me and I'll do my best to give you tons of reasons...
Forever Ocean Deep.